Office Cartwheels

office space


I don’t usually consider myself a jealous person, but lately I find myself becoming increasingly envious of the office space others may have in my building.

I am thinking some of my coworkers may have enough space in their office to do cartwheels, or perhaps they have installed one of those tornado simulators in their office spaces.

The reason I have come to this conclusion is for each and every scheduled obligation they come in disheveled, papers askew, winded, and looking as if they have been turned upside down.

One might think this is because they are engaged in an intense project or they have been holed up answering emails or in meetings with fellow colleagues, but….unfortunately…no. I know this because they haven’t answered an email or met a deadline in a month.

They have, in fact, been inside their tornado simulator and/or doing cartwheels.

As the Queen of Common Sense  here is best approach to handle the Office Cartwheeler.

  1. Try your best to avoid giving them any real responsibilities. Face it, they have adult ADHD and it’s just too much trouble.
  2. If you are in charge of a meeting in which you are expecting the Office Cartwheeler (we will call her “Carol”), here are some tips.
    1. Wait one minute for Carol and then begin.
    2. When  Carol comes in, do not let her interrupt, just yell over her, and continue on with the agenda. We do not have time to hear about the cartwheels and /or the tornado simulation. We really do have other shit to do and we want to go home at a normal time.
    3. Stick to the agenda. Remember Carol does not care about agendas. She cares about cartwheels and tornado simulations. Carol occasionally can pop up with a good idea, but unfortunately her lack of follow-through usually nulls this idea and causes the rest of us more work.

Now, I know the Office Preacher (post to follow later) will excuse the Office Cartwheeler by saying things like: “Carol is a really creative thinker and a free spirit.” There are times when the Office Preacher just needs to pray in silence and this would be one of the times for this person to engage that skill. Praise Jesus!


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